Since then, I have found myself mulling over this little question: “How do we stay tender?” It seems an uncommon word, one I rarely hear used, and when I do it is not within a context that suggests strength, resilience or wisdom. More often the word is associated with softness and a sort of vulnerability. When we act with tenderness — for example choosing to connect thoughtfully with another person regardless of time pressures, allowing ourselves to pause and be moved by an encounter with beauty or even treating ourselves with more compassion when we are hurting — there is always a danger we will be taken for granted, compromised or misunderstood in some way. But I don’t think that risk should prevent us from considering the ways in which our hearts can remain open in a world that seems to insist on encouraging indifference and guarded self-interest. The question then is: but how do we stay tender in such a world?